Since time immemorial, people have been trying to divide people in convenient categories, like we are a couple of items at Walmart. People have been divided into lines of religion (always a crowd favourite that one), colour (a close second), mugging power (thus laying the foundation for examinations) amongst others. Apart from the obvious detrimental effects (exams), other more harmful ones have followed, Racism etc.

A convenient solution is to group them how I group them. According to me there's only 2 types of people in the world : Those who take a bucket bath and those who take a shower. See, this list is exhaustive and covers everyone in the world. Now this list is not only a off the shelf invention but a in depth analysis of the people of earth (thus you know what I do during preparatory leave). Each group has their own characteristics, and is totally at peace with the other (hence, no more fights. Noble Peace Prize, here I come). It should be noted that the shower is essentially a reference to people who take their bath's under running water (waterfalls, garden hoses etc.), while the bucket is a reference to static water (bathtubs, ponds, rivers etc.)

The Bucket Group is the slower, lethargic, relaxed group. They have unlimited patience (they can wait hours for the bucket or the tub to fill) and usually have an aptitude for planning ahead (so they know that they have to leave the bucket to fill at x hours so as to have a bath at x+y hours). They usually have time to smell the flowers and nothing short of a nuclear fallout will hurry them up. However, once started slower, they usually speed up (in the bucket bath, for 15-20 mins, there's no water anywhere and then swoosh...). However I attribute this to time constraints rather than a burst of energy. Simply put, unless faced with a time limit, a bucket bather will continue at his own slow pace rather than speed up (thus making them prime examples of Newton's Law Of Inertia). Also, these people do not like repeating/re-doing anything. They are prim, proper and meticulous.

The Shower Group are nature's energy bundles. They want to have everything instantaneously (they wont wait for 30 seconds to start having a bath) and are usually impulsive (and they seldom regret their decisions). They have a devil may care attitude and prefer to rush through life (their favourite quote is usually on the lines of that unforgettable line from Kurt Cobain - "It's better to burn out than to fade away"). They prefer to do everything at a fast but constant rate and NOTHING is gonna make them change that. They don't bother planning ahead but rush headlong into life, doing everything at their own speed (thus they fully demonstrate Newton's Second Law, Force = Mass X Acceleration). They don't have a problem with doing anything a number of times. They usually have periods of high energy characterized by periods of lethargy. They are energetic, untidy and creative.

The last and most important difference is that a bucket bather may take a shower, but it will never be vice versa.

The above data is true to the best of my knowledge and has been verified in practical analysis (my parents and brother). This may also explain the eternal strife and lack of similarities between my family and me, considering that I am the ONLY one in my family who falls under the shower category.

Do leave comments on what you are and how much you agree. Cheers!!!

P.S. : Q - Why wasn't Jesus Christ Born In America???
A - Because in entire America they couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin!!!!

(I can just imagine raj cracking up at this).